Missing

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I have this thing,

Where somehow,

I keep missing

All the beginnings!

I don’t realize I’m alone

Until everyone I care for

is long gone

To take care of their own.

I don’t realize I’m in love

Until my heart aches from longing

And feel my soul splitting open

And suddenly words overgrow

My sovereignty is overthrown.

I don’t realize I’m depressed

Until weeks have passed

Where I haven’t stepped out

Of my mind

Leaving my body stone cold,

The only light I had

My hands have failed to hold.

But I’ve come to know my way around

The darkness that lives in me

I slip into it often

I don’t remember how or when,

Like everything else

I don’t realize it

Until I’ve fallen in.

I have missed many beginnings

But, I keep going anyway

If just to be there

To see the end.

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